Love from the inside out

Until relatively recently I used to watch myself practise and not recognise myself. Who was that strong girl who moved through vinyasas with grace and ease? Where was the girl with dark rings of exhaustion under her eyes, the unwashed hair (simply too much effort), and the cautious movements that anticipated pain and weakness in... Continue Reading →

Lockdown 2.0

“We’re better prepared this time”. I keep hearing people say this as England has returned to some sort of lockdown status. There’s a weariness and a resignation this time round. Less fear perhaps, despite the rising numbers of cases and deaths and the doomy predications about the resilience of the NHS. Even so, the situation... Continue Reading →

Rupture and continuity

One of my best friends nearly died recently. A ruptured appendix, a bungled diagnosis and delayed surgery. I've been visiting her in hospital, feeling helpless in the face of drips, oxygen, and the indignity of surgical gowns. She was weak and confused. I'm not sure she remembered if I'd been with her or not; she... Continue Reading →

No feeling is final

“Go to the limits of your longing... Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final” (Rilke) Practice at the moment is an experience of longing. I feel a deep yearning to be more fully with myself, to let go of the past, to feel the reality of the... Continue Reading →

A quiet revolution

I saw my physio again today for my rotator cuff injury. We've been working on this together for 5 months or so. I find these appointments really interesting. They become a ground for self-observation as much as āsana practice or meeting with my yoga teacher are. When I first needed physio appointments I was not... Continue Reading →

Running wild

When I first started Rolfing, my homework was about skipping and leaping, encouraging me to find a bit of joy in simple movements. I did my best, feeling a little foolish, needing to force the movements rather than finding them arising naturally. More recently my Rolfing homework has been about my effervescent ears. Same underlying... Continue Reading →

Jumping for joy

Rolfing is an odd process. It takes me by surprise over and over: how I feel in my body, what I learn, what I talk about with my Rolfer, and how endlessly wise she seems so me -- yet how subtly she conveys her teaching, through her fingertips and quiet patience with me as much... Continue Reading →

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