No feeling is final

“Go to the limits of your longing... Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final” (Rilke) Practice at the moment is an experience of longing. I feel a deep yearning to be more fully with myself, to let go of the past, to feel the reality of the... Continue Reading →

Optative

I'm learning the optative in Sanskrit. My textbook tells me "the optative is a verb form that indicates possibility. It can be translated as 'should', 'would', 'could', 'ought' or 'may'. I found sentence 3 in the first exercise ironically amusing: "The teacher ought to be content". After all, the last time I had met with... Continue Reading →

Sorrier namaskar

"Inhale hands to prayer. Make it real" My teacher knows I'm nervous, gives me a breath to settle myself here before I 'show him' my Surya Namaskar A. I know it's not, but it feels like a test. He's standing just on the edge of my field of vision, a safe distance away, an unnerving... Continue Reading →

Snow-ga

I once heard someone say you should never take up yoga if you like a good personal drama, if you're attached to making your life more exciting than it perhaps needs to be, if you actually enjoy getting a bit high on the everyday stresses. I think you'll know what I mean. I can fall... Continue Reading →

Complimentary yoga

“So pretty” is not a phrase I hear often when I’m in class. My teacher is very sparse with anything that might sound like a compliment. He’s big on no judgment, no expectation: everything is simply along a spectrum of experience, where we practise non-attachment to any particular outcome. It’s strong yoga medicine: ultimately good... Continue Reading →

Forceful yoga

I was listening to a senior teacher talking recently about her background in dance and music and performance and wondering how to relate to that. I am not an exhibitionist or a performer. I write an anonymous blog. I prefer to be a silent witness in the back corner. Barely seen, not heard. My social interactions... Continue Reading →

Enough already!

"Enough already!" It depends how you say it. It's either a slightly tetchy way of telling someone to stop doing something or it's a kind acknowledgement of the sufficiency in all things. I'm flip-flopping back and forth at the moment with both ways of talking to myself. I am having serious 'enough' issues, feeling never... Continue Reading →

On practising when tired

Teachers often caution against practising when tired: it's when the injuries happen. Your attention lapses or you're not well set up. It's sensible advice, but sometimes it really bothers me and I hear it too personally. My inner demons wickedly translate these words into "you're sick and you have no place here and this practice is... Continue Reading →

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