I retreated poolside this afternoon. I didn’t want a swim, I just wanted some quiet mat-time.
But we don’t always get what we want.
Then Hubby came along. Partly I think to distract Mama. He took a few photos.
Then another resident came by for his after-work swim.
I felt rather self-conscious at first, but once Hubby was looking after Mama I let that go. I did a bright and breezy practice, feeling joyful and relaxed. I am on holiday after all! But pratyahara? No way. I couldn’t forget there were people about all intently watching me. I kept my attention on what was going on physically (ever thoughtful of my hamstring) but that’s not the same thing at all. That’s simply a form of concentration. I remained all too aware of what was going on around.
And I admit I had to work hard to keep doing my practice the way that I needed to, without reacting to any of the running commentary and questions that I could hear from my mum, bravely fielded by my husband. I like her interest and her curiosity, but she doesn’t see my mat time as the private practice that I want it to be. Need it to be. But I ended up feeling a bit selfish that I wasn’t engaging with others!
As I rolled up my mat the man swimming called out to me complimenting my practice, insisting that I was ‘très souple’ and looked ‘professionelle’. He had apparently been watching me as closely as my family were. Very nice for my ego. My ego never takes a holiday!